Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize