Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
