I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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