at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
