We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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