ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
