the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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