Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
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