I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Randomize
