She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
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