It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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