last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
i think my cat just said my name.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize