At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
