Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Randomize
