Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Randomize