? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
