she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
40s are totally the cure
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
