So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
