marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
