she woke up with a sticky ear
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Randomize
