4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I think a kid would responsible me up
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize