I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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