my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Randomize