It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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