it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
