I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
He better not be in your backpack
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
