OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
