real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
