well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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