I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize