That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
