she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
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