Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
