I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
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