The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize