thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize