Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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