my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
