It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I wish you could order shots online.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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