I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Randomize
