no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
