Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
my sisters under your porch take her home
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Randomize
