Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
