just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
