I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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