i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
There r osticjed everywhere
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
