But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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