If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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