Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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