do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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