My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
