You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
