Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
