Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
